Freddys Stupid Pizzeria
by NumbDrumPoul
Summary: A compilation of weird idiocy! Takes place in three universes, Fnaf 1, Fnaf 2 and Fnaf 3!
1. Night 1

Bons eyes were bloodshot, as he looked up on the roof and saw mangle **hanging **around. He was ready. "Mangle.. will you…." Mangle looked down at sen-bon, and before bon could finish, mangle said "Bon. You are the biggest shitlord I have ever seen. You look like a drunk bunny who was spray painted blue. No bonnie. I will not.". Bons jaw hung open, and quickly hissed back "I was gonna ask if you will let me use your **printer**, Shithead!" Mangle had a confused look, as bonnie stormed away. "Hm. He's a feisty shitlord" Mangle whispered to herself (that happened in fnaf 2 pizzeria)

**MEANWHILE (Thats gonna be my transition from one room/pizzeria to another)** The pale light of Freddys **computer** was the only thing lighting up the backstage. He was on tumblr, looking at fan art, when he saw a club called 'Fnaf Fanboys' "Hm. This club doesn't look bad, I think i'll join!". Freddy was looking at some fan art, when he saw something absolutely unseeable. He was sick. It was a picture of him and bonnie well… Freddy's jaw hung open wide, as he looked uncontrollably at the picture. "No. No this can't be. This….. No….. Why….." Freddy walked out, still shocked. He slammed the door, went into the kitchen, and hid in the oven. Never to come out again. Bonnie walked into backstage, looking for freddy. "Freddy! I made some chicken wings!….. FREDDY! COME SHOVE THESE GODDAMN CHICKEN WINGS DOWN YOUR THROAT!" Bonnie, realising freddy wasn't there, decided to look at his history. He came upon 'Supply closet Yaoi'. "What is this?" Bonnie said curiously. He clicked on, and made a sheepish little "Eep" As he fell back in his chair.' (That chapter was based off fnaf 1 place)

**MEANWHILE **The night guard thrusted his hips, as did the instructor on the computer screen. "Now left foot out, right foot in, twirl and jump!" The security guard did as followed and landed in his ballet shoes on the hard tiles of his office. Mike looked over his shoulder and felt his face flush red as springtrap stood there with a camcorder, pissing himself laughing "This is some shocking business right here, mate!" Springtrap said sarcastically "HEY! GIVE THAT BACK!" The security guard yelled, running at spring trap. Springtrap quickly pulled up his left hand and extended his elbow, hitting mike right in the chest. The security guard felt cold consume his body, and darkness cover himself. In his final moments before going unconscious, he saw springtrap plug his camcorder into his computer, and giggled as he logged into youtube. (based in fnaf 3 office)

So I hope you guys liked that! its a tad bit different than normal, but I certainly think I will continue this story! Also, thanks for all the views on my other story, I appreciate it!


	2. Night 2

***Seal noises* Hello readers! And welcome to the stupid shit story!. So for some reason, people like this! So I'm going to continue this story… Read on!**

**(takes place in fnaf 1)**

"Yarr ye scurvy dogs! I be a pirate o' the seven seas!" Foxy yelled "FOXY YOU S**TLORD! IF YOU DONT GO TO SLEEP RIGHT NOW I WILL TEAR YOU FOX NUTSACK OFF YOU ASSWIPE!" Freddy yelled out. "Yee landlubber don't have no rule on me!" Freddy pulled out his iPhone and put it up to his ear *Insert inaudible phone talk here*. Suddenly there was a flash of pink light, and out of nowhere a golden version of freddy appeared! "Who the bloody hell are ye' lad?" Foxy asked. "Omg I'm like supergay gf! know worldwide!" He said. *Freddy's pov* Oh shit… I was trying to call the lenpai army! Fucking knew I shouldn't have had supergay gf on speedial… Fuck! *Nobody's pov* "So, what do you hotties need me for?" gf said. "We really don't need you for anything….." Freddy said sarcastically. Tears brew in go's eyes "So you don't need me…." Gf started to bawl "YOU ARE SUCH A MEANIE!" He disappeared in a pink mist of MISTeriousness. Chica got up "Who was that?" she asked curiously. "That was just…. The milkman!" Freddy said calmly "Heheheheheh" Foxy said, half shivering, half pissing himself from laughing "You dirty bastard…." Freddy said

**Im gonna have to end it here so I can start righting ANOTHER story! It involves me being a furry for a week…. Well not in real life, But what I would do if I was a furry for a week!**


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